What comes to mind?
Submissive. Soft Spoken. Graceful. Delicate. Feminine. Subservient. Fluent in their ethnic language. Good at math. Bad drivers? The list can go on and on.
I am NONE of the above.
Growing up, I'd get told things like:
"Why can't you be more like ____?"
"I'm sure your parents didn't raise you to be like this."
"Why must you be so loud?"
"You're a girl, you can't act like that."
Etc.
I have a very strong personality, am loud, outspoken, clumsy, accident prone, and grew up a total 'tomboy.' I've been known to question rules/authority if they don't make sense; not in a negative way, but because I'm not the type of person to do something simply because I'm told to. Math, I struggled; I did pretty well in school, but it wasn't the least bit easy. I also don't speak Japanese.
To this day, I'll even get comments like, "Wow, it's like you're not even Asian!" In high school I was once called a "banana" because I'm 'Yellow on the outside but White on the inside.' I was once at a friend's house and some random guy approached me and said, "Growing up, did you watch Pokemon? By the way, I love Anime." When people find out my ethnic origin, a good majority will attempt to start talking to me in Japanese.
I dislike the looks and reactions I get when people find out that I don't speak my ethnic language, or when I'm a little overly boisterous when I'm having a good time. I don't have a third eye growing out of my forehead, I just don't fit the stereotypes.
- D.
- D.
You're as Asian as I am German--but no one acts surprised that I can't speak German. Hopefully before long stereotypes will fade into the past.
ReplyDeleteI usually gravitate towards former tomboys. Most of my female friends fall into that category (they're more interesting) and my wife was a tomboy. Her mom was always telling her things like "ladies don't laugh that loud"' "ladies don't do this", "ladies don't do that". She finally started telling her mom it sounded like ladies didn't have any fun. :)
Lol, yes! I agree with your wife very much :)
DeleteI remember your mom used to get mad about the grass stains.
DeleteWow, a third eye? That sounds great :) Yes, growing up I was also taught so many rules about what was expected of me, not like white guy specific rules (no dancing, no basketball, no rapping) but just what my behavior was supposed to be. And anything outside that behavior or even looked a little different was very wrong. And decades later I am just now getting free of some of those expectations, realizing the only person I need to please or live up to is me. Now I am on a journey to see who that really is. Very interesting post! Thanks for the kind words on my blog, dear!
ReplyDeleteAll Things Bright and Lovely
Yes, I couldn't agree more! It just took me a little over 20 years before I was completely comfortable with the fact that I'm so different from the "typical" cookie-cutter Asian female :)
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